OK, so I have a dilemma now. I’ve been through the pre-adoption process with two different adopters for Shayna so far and they’ve both fallen apart at the last minute. The first had a family emergency and the second found out they are about to be uprooted by the military.
Of course, Snick and I have become more attached to Shay every day and vice versa. Most of you remember how upset Snick was after ~T~ and Secret moved out? Well, he’s loving having a buddy around every day again! A few mornings ago I was watching the two of them tear around the dog run so fast that both their tails were sticking out behind them and laughing at how much they enjoy each other. I started thinking maybe I should adopt her!
A couple nights ago, I took Shay to my friend lulu’s for a test run sleepover because it looks like I’ll still have her when Snick and I are supposed to be in Indianapolis for Christmas. lulu signed up as a temporary foster and said she’d keep Shay while I’m gone, so we were testing to see how lulu’s dog feels about that. lulu emailed me the next morning and said
She sat in front of the door for about an hour after you left. Then she curled up on the couch and went to sleep. she misses you and you can tell she doesn’t know why you left her here.
and then in reply to my reply a little while later
She wouldn’t sleep with me. I put her in the bed, but she got out. She slept on the couch. At the dog run, she sat at the fence and looked for you guys. I think it would be good if you adopted her. She’s very attached.
I keep bouncing the pros and cons around in my head and I just can’t figure out what the best decision would be. Please help me decide!
Of course!
- Snickers loves her.
- I love her.
- She loves us!
- She and Snick keep each other company during the day when I’m at work.
- I don’t feel guilty if I go out with friends occasionally or do something else that leaves Snick at home… he has Shayna!
- I am no longer spending money for Snick to go to daycare once a week and my dog walker doesn’t charge me more for two dogs. That probably balances out the extra cost of food and treats!
- Shayna is SOOOO sweet and affectionate.
- Shay is SUCH an easy keeper. If I’m ever going to adopt a pal for Snick, she’s the best choice. She’s hardly any extra work at all and she’s so well behaved!
- I know from the way she reacts when I leave her places that she will be heartbroken (at first) when she is adopted. If I keep her, she gets to stay happy!
NO WAY!
- I take Snick with me whenever feasible when I travel. Taking two dogs would seldom be feasible.
- Eventually, there will be vet bills. That’s expensive enough for one!
- If ~T~ moves home at some point (which isn’t looking likely, but still…) I’d have a serious Inu surplus!
- I have several friends that are willing to dogsit Snickers if I go away for a weekend. That wouldn’t work with two dogs. So, what would I do with the two of them?
- I don’t give Snickers the kind of one-on-one attention I did before. For example, I feel BAD if I take Snickers somewhere alone (like a class or event) because then Shayna is home alone. Snick hasn’t been to work with me in almost two months.
- Catching a cab with one dog is tough. Catching a cab with two dogs? Nearly impossible.
- Finding a landlord that allows one dog is tough. Finding a landlord that allows two dogs? Again, nearly impossible. (OK, maybe this doesn’t count, since I already decided I didn’t care when I adopted Secret for Miss ~T~.)
- I can easily handle one dog through whatever life may throw at me, but I’m not so sure about two. (Think evacuating the city type things.)
- Snick and I won’t be available to foster any more Shibas in need if we adopt Shay!
I think, if it were just about me and my own convenience, I wouldn’t do it. However, when I think of both Snickers and Shayna, I want to do it. Snick is very happy with a pal and Shay is obviously very happy living with us! Someone emailed me yesterday and said "Shayna was unhappy where she was and now she is happy and content. I would say go for it!!!" That makes sense. Yesterday I was leaning towards doing it. Today I am leaning towards not doing it. What do you guys think? At the very least, please vote. I’d love to see your comments or email on the subject also!
Commenting on my own post… while chatting with Ami just now, I realized something I didn’t mention in my post. Owning two dogs in a 5th floor walkup is not quite as simple as owning two dogs in most places would be. At a bare minimum, a walk involves going down 4 flights of stairs and several blocks west to get out of the crowds. Unless I want to spend my whole day walking dogs, I can’t feasibly walk them separately, so they have to be satisfied with ALWAYS walking together (which Snick doesn’t particularly enjoy).
Also, living in Manhattan, I don’t have a car, so going anywhere with them involves walking them both or catching a cab with them both.
Hmmm… unless you’re going to stop fostering even if you _don’t_ adopt Shay, then all of the “harder to do with two dogs” things are kind of red herrings (except the finding/keeping an apartment one, ’cause at least with a foster you have the option of going back to one dog if needed). You’re likely to have two dogs regardless. Not being able to foster is a tough one to get past, though. Every time A&B puts out a plea for an emergency foster, I feel guilty that I can’t take on another dog. At the same time, I don’t regret adopting Thunder… especially not when he’s being all snuggly (which he’s not right now… right now he’s zoomy).
Not sure how much help I’m being, but those are my immediate thoughts.
Flip a coin
No one is helping! I am getting email and comments that all say “I know I’m not helping, but…” LOL
The only decisiveness so far has been from my friend Judy, who said:
So, I asked “but what if something happens down the road and I can’t handle two dogs?” and she said “So, you adopt her out then.” and I said “Wouldn’t that be hypocritical of me to give up a dog?!?!” and her reply was:
What do you guys think about that?
The landlords in my neighborhood allow 2 dogs.
so I think you should a) keep her
and b) move near us.
which is no help at all I know.
Rafter helped me write this.
XOXMary
on the other hand, Shayna is a dog. she is happy now, and she will be happy again.
Having been in shibas for some time, having fostered over twenty dogs and having two of my own shibas who have an exclusively tight bond, I have to say, with utmost confidence, that having two shibas is WAY BETTER than having one. For the dogs most of all if they have separation issues and have such a great bond to each other… and secondly because having two dogs will round out your life even more. My two are different from each other in many ways and where one is great for something, the other fills that gap in another area. Such as: I have one very cuddly shiba and one very not cuddly. However, the not cuddly one can go out in public places much better than the cuddly one… those are simple reasons… AND I spend a LOT of time traveling with two dogs. It really isn’t that much different and you do get used to it. They can learn to walk well together as a team and they do get that free time at the park, and in the house. You can also do extra things one on one with each dog, say an extra walk or a class where both dogs go but one does a time out- maybe the class has crates you could borrow and then you work with one at a time, but work with both dogs in class. Many people do it and it works. As far as fostering, I wouldn’t feel so bad about it. Not so many shibas you try fostering are going to hit it off with Snickers. It could be a disaster someday.
I do differ on one thing tho= you adopt.. it’s for life. I don’t care what anyone else says, when you adopt it’s your kid and that’s that. Look at all the lame excuses you see in rescue!! 🙂
I know you love your place but it wouldn’t be the end of the world if someday you had to move. I don’t think you’ll have to worry about it anytime soon, but home is where the love is…
My two cents plus!
Love, Rae
Oh, this is so nice to see you are giving consideration to the thought of keeping her!
My hubby was opposed to getting a pal for Scout. He was a 1-dog household type person. I snuck Max in while he was away for work. Of course he blew up when he got back but the next morning, I opened 1 eye to see him hugging Max. He proclaimed ‘okay we can keep him but no more dogs!’
And he hasn’t regretted it since. Now he’s the first person to toll the virtues of having a 2-dog household to all the people we know with 1 dog. The pros: they keep each other company and you don’t feel as guilty going out; no doggy daycare costs; they have a relatable pack of their own dog-dog vs. dog-human; watching them play and do the shiba-500 together, etc.
I think Judy was spot on as far as the cons… Things have a way of working themselves out down the line. I’m sure you’ll make the right decision for yourself in the end whatever way it goes…
Hey, I think if you all love each other and your happy then you should keep her. You’ve already had experience with taking care of two dogs (with some help from me 🙂 he he) and you’re amazing at training Snickers. Then, if taxis see that they’re so well behaved that might help with that problem. Basically, I think if you guys are happy then it should be worth all those “No Way”s you got.
PLUS then I get to meet her at some point! YAYYYYY!!!
Oh, and I’m probably going to high school here so now Snick has a new little sister, if she stays. 🙂 YOU ROCK!!!
MISS YOU! 🙁
:p
You already know my opinion. I debated with everyone for 3 weeks as to whether we should take Bear into our home. The majority of the cons were around Lily’s little schedule and walking. Lily,like Snicker’s, loves having another Inu in the house and they really do love each other. Initially things were not so easy but once we got into a routine it was fine. I do think that every time a dog gets settled and rehomed again it is such a stress. Bear is 11 months old and had 4 homes in his small life and it will take a while to get him fully settled and understand this is forever.
What if the next foster family for Shayna didnt work out and she ended up back at square 1 again? I think you would be a perfect forever pack member and if you get to live in a yurt, you wouldnt have to worry about stairs or landlords 🙂
I think you should keep her…I think it’s meant to be! I read all the comments and agree with them, Rae, especially.
Adopt her. We were conflicted about adopting a second dog, but really, its not harder to travel and catch cabs, and you get used to it very quickly with a second dog. Plus, Snick clearly loves having friends to live with and in time, the extra attention you gave him when he was an only dog will not be missed because he will have Shay as his constant companion. Think of it as though you had accidentally had a sibling for T – she might be jealous at first but the bond they would form would be unbreakable.
J, I say keep her. Here’s my rationale.
I understand your pros & cons and think they are ALL valid. One thing that I would point out:
If, in your heart of hearts, you just cannot justify keeping her due to the expenses and adjustments required, she WILL ADAPT. I know it doesn’t seem like it. But dogs are resilient. They are like kids, and they bounce back. Yes, it takes time. Yes, it’s painful for the new owner and the dog. But I believe she would recover.
Now. That said, from what I can see from my limited perspective, she is a VERY good match for you and for Snickers. You keep mentioning that he doesn’t get as much one to one from you- does it appear that he’s suffering? It certainly doesn’t seem that way to me.
Your concerns re: the vet costs and travel with two dogs while not deal-breakers, are worth nothing. And yet both are a manageable- I find it hard to believe someone won’t watch them both, that there are ways to cope with traveling with each.
Bottom line: Shay seems to fit with you in a way Seeky never quite did. She seems to make you happy, and we already know Snick is. Even though you could not foster anymore, your efforts with NYCSR are still extraordinarily effective- and there will be other fosters.
“Your concerns re: the vet costs and travel with two dogs while not deal-breakers, are worth nothing. And yet both are a manageable- I find it hard to believe someone won’t watch them both, that there are ways to cope with traveling with each.”
Sheesh, I should never type before coffee- I meant “noting” not nothing, and “are manageable”. Bad, Lachlan, BAD.
As you know, my wife and I struggled with the decision to get another Shiba about 6 months ago. We finally let our emotions win the argument, and adopted Kodi (Blueberry) as a friend/sister for Tika. I can say that they are so happy having each other around, and it’s been a great experience having Kodi grow attached to his new family. The two of them are excellent companions, and it enables us to not have to worry when we leave them home for the day. It is definitely harder with two of them (walks take some getting used to), and traveling is difficult. But all in all, having two is more than twice as good as having one.
So? What did you decide?
Stop keeping us in suspense dang it!!!!!
Did you make a decision?
BTW Happy New Year 🙂
Hi Jenna! Did you decide to keep Shay? Inquiring minds would love to know!!(We hope so!) Her picture is no longer on the available for adoption pics on the rescue site.
I wish I lived closer, I’d pet-sit for you!
When you are old, you won’t regret the things you didn’t get to do because you had two dogs…
But you WILL regret not having given a dog a home, if that dog was obviously meant to be yours.
Sometimes we have to think more about giving that about hardship to ourselves… but in the end, aren’t we the ones who have *received* what was really important?
As someone with three dogs, who has never taken a vacation with her husband during our married life (because we won’t kennel our dogs), I totally get the hardships of multi-pet ownership. I also totally get what has been returned to me!!! It has been infinitely more valuable to know I have given a great home to some wonderful beasties.
Do what you truly feel is right for THEM. It will end up being what was right for you.
Best wishes and good luck!
P.S. I think one of our adopted rescues may be part Shiba – that is how I came across your blog. Thanks for sharing all the neat stuff about your dogs!